Deficit Disorder.
This is how it manifests:
I decide to wash my car. As I start toward the garage,
I notice that there is mail on the hall table.
I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the
rubbish bin under the table, and notice that the rubbish bin is full.
So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the rubbish
first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the post-box when I take
out the rubbish anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my
chequebook off the table, and see that there is only one cheque left.
My extra cheques are in my desk in the study, so I go to my desk where I
find the can of Coke that I had been drinking.
I'm going to look for my cheques, but first I need to push the
Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.
I see that the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the
refrigerator to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the coke a vase of flowers on the counter
catches my eye--they need to be watered.
I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that
I've been searching for all morning.
I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the
flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with
water and suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen
table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for
the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide
to put it back in the lounge where it belongs, but first I'll water the
flowers. I splash some water on the flowers, but most of it spills on the
floor. So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and wipe
up the spill. Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was
planning to do.
At the end of the day: the car isn't washed, the bills
aren't paid, there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter, the flowers
aren't watered, there is still only one cheque in my chequebook, I can't
find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did
with the car keys.
Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,
I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really
tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help
for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.
Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!
GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY.
GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL
LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC!
